Everything Everywhere All at Once Pt. 2
Hello everyone!
Here is a part two of my thoughts (and hopefully a reflection of yours) on the movie, Everything Everywhere All at Once. For those who are curious, the first part centers around the movie’s accomplishments as representation rather than focusing on the plot and thematic questions it raises (which this article will cover!)
(Before the article, I would like to pay homage to the wonderful costume designs in this film!!!!! Just look at this screenshot from the movie!)
The first thing I want to address is how perfectly or holistically this movie portrays the modern-day, gen-Z immigrant child. In the film, Joy, Evelyn’s daughter and supporting lead character, faces the tension between her and her mother that stems from many reasons, the major one being how Evelyn is unable to fully understand and accept Joy’s girlfriend Becky. Evelyn considers queer identity to be too progressive for her father, Joy’s grandfather, to understand, so she ushers her to keep it quiet and lowkey. While I myself have never faced this sort of shushing due to my sexuality, in many immigrant families and households, an array of “taboo” or “Western” idealogy remain un-discussed. For me, that meant progressive movements like BLM or #MeToo were never fully fleshed out during conversations with parents, or the topic of mental health ended at “my generation…” The beautiful thing about this movie, however, is that this mentality does not persist; ultimately, the characters come to an understanding, the beginning of true empathy, for one another.
Initially, I wanted the question to be something along the lines of “what are some topics your family does not talk about it and how would you liked to have discussed it?” While I still think meditating on what you’ve missed out on in conversations is important, I think asking “what are ways I can or had slowly introduced empathy and understanding in my own family?” is far more interesting and applicable to this movie that is so centered around growth.
Another major set of themes this movie touches on is family and familial love. Although the idea of family is so crucial to the Asian experience, this movie plays a refreshing twist on it as it discusses the intricacies of forgiveness and the cruel love-hate relationship that occurs within family dynamics.
Forgiveness is major in EEAOO because I think there was so much more than the typical (yet still gold) fruit-cutting story that many immigrant students default to. That story, though emotional and genuine, emphasizes and normalizes the way family members brush past conflicts as a form of forgiveness since instead of communicating with one another, a bowl of cut-up fruit is supposed to represent unspoken apologies. I think that story is cute, I really do, but I love how EEAOO truly embodies communication and how sometimes, forgiveness takes time. It is not always immediate, just like when Evelyn thinks she has unlocked the key to her daughter’s emotions, Joy has to remind her that she is still hurt and that healing still needs to take place.
What are your own experiences with forgiveness? How do you think you would have redone moments of apology or forgiving others?
The last thing I’ll discuss is how complex Evelyn’s relationships are, especially with her family members. She hates how “useless” or unfulfilling her life with her husband Waymond are, yet still loves him for he is her husband; she never truly understands and feels rather disappointed by her daughter, but still feels the maternal need to protect her; and she never shows how much she loves Gong Gong, but still always tends to his needs. This consistent thread of never truly loving someone but loving them because of situations makes it hard for viewers to find Evelyn the most lovely, wonderful character out there. Yet it is undeniable how accurately those dynamics reflect reality. Similar to the way it portrays forgiveness, the film ultimately shows that love, true love, is always better, as everyone seems genuinely happy to be with one another when they no longer focus on the negatives.
Why do you think so many familial dynamics are tied to this love-hate relationship? What are some ways do you think you can combat them?
That is all I had to say about EEAOO, and I truly think it is a wonderful movie everyone should watch.